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Real life
Posted On 07/03/2010 16:58:02 by Cara

I'm really pleased to hear from friends here and also pleased that you all have LIVES to go to.  I suppose when you think about it that is the goal of recovery, to restore us to normality.

I'm just getting to that point.  I mean first of all we are addicts and the addiction is our focus, then along comes recovery and that takes over for a while, it has to really.  Then sometimes for a while helping other addicts can be a focus.  But sooner or later real life calls.

I believe that is what is happening to me.  I have settled down into a steady routine of recovery activities, I don't get tempted like I used to and if I do I know what to do about it.  I'm learning to live in the moment and to concentrate on what is happening here and now.   If I have a problem I take a deep breath and work out what I can do and what to accept.

It is hard because I am coming face to face with some of the realities which drove me into addiction and one or two of the problems caused by my addiction which at the moment have to go into the acceptance list.  I am realising that I will probably always have problems in relationships because of an underlying psychological condition I have been denying.

But this is good because for the first time in my life I seem to be accepting me as I am, not trying to change and be someone else or find someone else or something else to sort me. I am admitting that there are things I find difficult and I am asking for appropriate help and support.

I'm not being complacent though, I know I am still an addict.  But I can see how real life can get more inviting.

Tags: Recovery Acceptance Relationships



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Viewing 1 - 3 out of 3 Comments

From: KeithB
07/06/2010 11:10:40

Good to see the progress. Hope you learn who the real YOU is an love that YOU unconditionally. When you get to that point, think you'll find the relationship issues diminish greatly!


luv

From: byGrace
07/06/2010 10:47:07

I think that one of the powerful things in recovery is the realization that we are broken. My take on life is that everyone is broken at some level, so in the world of recovery we at least have made that connection and so hopefully we will not be as apt to turn again to denial of the fact. But going out to "real-life" where people may not have been as extreme in their behaviors (or sometimes good at covering it up for a while), is indeed another matter. Sometimes it easy to think in that world that things are different, that they are not broken. Indeed, they may not be AS broken, but everywhere is broken to some extent, IHMO. I am thankful for being able to live in both camps in my life, as I learn from both of them. Hopefully each camp can learn from the other, also, knowing that we are all humans at our core, from the same roots of humanity.

Sounds like you are growing in your recovery and in life. As Dennis said, it is good to hear from you and your thoughts.

 

From: DennisS
07/05/2010 17:20:48

Cara -


     Good to hear from you. I understand when "life" decides to rudely assign us priorities , we get to do those things set in front of us. Recovery is still there on the plate, but often we begin to spend more time in the physical world attending to it, versus the virtual.


     Many find things they needed in our electronic world of recovery and were able to move on. This is part of their growth in recovery, a return to a modicum of normalicy. One of those things is gaining the strength and ability to interact with others - without the accompanying fears many of us had when we first got here. Tis a good thing...


Hugs,


Dennis

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